Achieve Your Goals Now By Ditching Your Excuses

Recently, I watched 'The Jeremy Kyle Show'. Jeremy is a no nonsense talk show host who tries to sort out the broken relationships of his guests. Many have feeble excuses for their irresponsible behaviour. Jeremy puts them right.

In this episode, he spoke to a father who had separated from his partner and their son. His former partner complained that he had the opportunity to see his son at weekends but seldom took advantage of this opportunity.

One of his excuses was that he was living with friends and had not settled down anywhere since the split. Jeremy pointed out that this was a feeble excuse. He could meet his son at the swimming pool or a caf or just sit on the swings at a local park and chat for two or three hours.

He warned the father that if he did not keep up his relationship with his son he would lose it forever and that would break his heart. He finished by telling him:

"Get off your backside and make it happen!"

Jeremy, before that final comment, had already given the father the extra motivation to make more frequent visits happen. He had warned him of the life time regret that would follow his failure to take action.

Once the father had admitted the laziness and lack of motivation hidden under his excuses about being homeless, he could work on his motivation and think about the pain of a life without his son. He could realize that, though his domestic arrangements were temporarily out of his control, the ability to arrange visits with his son every single weekend was well within his control.

Many of us need to take action and make things happen but laziness and fear can cause us to create one excuse after another as a smokescreen to hide our inner lack of discipline, energy and confidence.

Some excuses are, of course, genuine but far too many are simply lies. If I were to say I have no time to go for a walk or do some weight lifting, I would be lying. I always have time to walk and to lift weights but, on some days, I don't feel like tearing myself away from my fascinating computer.

Some wait for inspiration to appear and motivate them to make a start on whatever goal they are working on. They will have a long wait. Inspiration arrives more often after you start doing something than before you start.

Many of the world's greatest writers just sit down at their desk and start writing whether they are inspired or not. They never use the excuse that they do not feel like writing or were not inspired.

I tell my martial arts students to attend training whether they feel like it or not. Progress will be very slow if they only attend when they feel in the mood. Usually, they feel like training soon after the session has started.

Even if they don't, they will make progress. People who show up regularly move swiftly ahead of those who are still waiting to be inspired!

It has been said that, on the internet, many people make excuses rather than money. They put off the marketing tasks like advertising which are somewhat boring and spend time on the tasks like product creation which are more obviously interesting and creative.

I am one of these. I enjoy writing articles and creating ebooks but I hate marketing. I need to change my attitude and follow the advice of David Vallieres:

"Some people just like to make excuses instead of money. NO PROBLEM... leaves more on the table for us winners. DO something even if it's wrong. Just GET STARTED."

According to David Vallieres, the losers:

"Wait until everyone else around them is making money by working a realistic plan and then call those who do make money "lucky". My opinion: Make your own luck. Work hard, but DO SOMETHING."

David believes that opportunity is often disguised as work!

A favourite excuse for not doing something whether it is marketing or anything else is to say: "I don't know how to do it." The short answer to this is "Learn how to do it!"

You don't need to stop learning just because you have left college. It has never been easier to learn anything. We have millions of books and millions of internet resources which can teach us almost anything we want to know.

I have enough books in my garage alone to last a life time and enough internet courses on DVD in my front room to last several lifetimes.

I didn't know how to set up a website so I phoned a local web designer and asked him to teach me. Since then I have had at least one lesson from him every week for two or three years and am making progress in understanding the latest cutting edge skills in the art of web design.

This is an expensive but effective way of learning. If I could not have afforded lessons, I could have taken free lessons online. There are few genuine excuses.

Once we realize that we are making excuses based on factors outside our control like - no one taught me how to design websites at school - we can take action based on factors which are within our control - like I can choose to pay a tutor to teach me what I want to know now.

If I make the excuse that I don't have enough money to pay for lessons, I can either get free tuition online as I mentioned or I can choose to earn more money. The excuse 'I can't afford it' is another common one and it is usually based on what we hold in our current account rather than on the money we can choose to make.

Once you realize that 'I cannot afford it' is an excuse and that you alone have control over your internal thoughts and actions, you can deal with the problem. I, for example, could earn more money by teaching more martial arts classes or by advertising for more students.

I could even get round to doing the boring internet marketing work that I have neglected. I am sure it won't feel so boring once the money starts pouring in.

If we want something badly enough, we can find ways that we can make the money we need to buy it. If we accept the amount of money we already have as our limit, we will constantly feel unable to buy what we want.

If you don't know how to make some money, you can learn a skill which will allow you to earn some. I tell my martial arts students that they can make a full time or part time living teaching self-defence - a skill which is essential in the modern world.

They need to earn their black belt first and do at least two instructor courses and they are then qualified to start earning back all the money they spent on their training and more. Ditch your excuses and then most things are possible.

I will take a break from writing this article to go for that walk I mentioned earlier! I have just got back. This article has motivated at least one person to ditch his excuses!

Over a year ago, Steve Pavlina, wrote an outstanding article called 'Feeble Excuses'. I am indebted to him for some of the ideas in my own article. Here is one great quote:

"Dont let excuses run your life Its easier to say, I dont know how than it is to say, Im unwilling to learn. But when you admit your unwillingness, laziness, or lack of motivation, then youre finally facing the truth, and from that point youll have the opportunity to grow. For example, if you face your unwillingness to learn, you may decide that even though it would be a lot of work to learn a new skill, you could do it if you wanted it badly enough and really applied yourself."

What, then, can you and I do when we feel the desire to make feeble excuses?

Get off our backsides and make things happen!

We always have time to do what is important so don't say 'I don't have the time'.

Don't wait for the inspiration to do something. Start and inspiration will arrive later.

Do something to make money even if it is wrong. Just get going. You can correct your mistakes later and work out a realistic plan for success. Then work your plan.

If you don't know how to do something, learn how to do it.

If you cannot afford something, earn enough money to buy it. If necessary learn a skill which will help you to earn the money.

Realise what is under your control and what isn't. Most life changing stuff is in your own mind and under your own control. Improve what you can control and don't use what you can't as material for your excuses.

I will finish with an inspiring quote from the author, Alan Cohen:

"There are two kinds of people in the world: those who make excuses and those who get results. An excuse person will find any excuse for why a job was not done, and a results person will find any reason why it can be done. Be a creator, not a reactor."

John Watson is an award winning teacher and 5th degree blackbelt martial arts instructor. Check out his ebook on using your innate abilities to achieve the life of your dreams, by visiting:

http://www.motivationtoday.com/36_laws.php

The book is full of practical ideas for achieving your goals and inspiring quotes, stories and ideas which can motivate you to make your dreams a reality.

Feel free to reprint this article in its entirety in your ezine or on your site but please include the resource box above

Huis Klein